Day Six Challenge – WHAT DO YOU NEED TO FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR?
“You must forgive those who hurt you, even if whatever they did to you is unforgivable in your mind. You will forgive them not because they deserve to be forgiven, but because you don’t want to suffer and hurt yourself every time you remember what they did to you. Forgiveness is your own mental healing. Forgiveness is an act of self-love.” – Don Miguel Ruiz
“Forgive yourself first. Release the need to replay a negative situation over and over again in your mind. Don’t become a hostage to your past by always reviewing and reliving your mistakes. Don’t remind yourself of what should have, could have, or would have been. Release it and let it go. Move on.” – Les Brown
“The Ultimate reason that we forgive is to keep our own hearts soft, to allow our own soul the freedom to breath and to keep us as humans in a state of grace. We never do it for the other person. We let go of the pain so our wounds can heal, release the hurt, betrayal and disappointment so we can experience the ultimate freedom. It does not condone the behavior of family, friends, or foes, nor does it give them permission to do it again, Forgiveness does not make us a doormat. We forgive so that we may be free. To love again, to laugh again, to live again and to let go of the shackles around our hearts. This includes forgiving ourselves as well.” – Stacie Campanelli
I want to share a story of forgiveness. I went through a horrible post-partum depression when I stopped breast-feeding my son who was about 21 months (one year and nine months) at the time. I was having trouble reconnecting with him. I felt like I was absent. I was present physically but not mentally. I went to a therapist who suggested an activity. I laid down on the bed put my hand on my heart and I said to myself the following – “I forgive myself for not being a perfect mother. I forgive myself for having difficulty reconnecting with my son. I am a loving mother and my love is adequate.” All of sudden I started to cry and I didn’t stop for a long time. When I finally stopped I went to my son’s room where my mom was rocking him. She handed me my son and I was able to feel that bond again the love had always been present I had just gotten lost.
We are not perfect. We are human beings and therefore imperfect. All we can do… is be our best and do our best. My recent break-up devastated me. I’m angry with myself for allowing less than perfect treatment for a long time. I need to forgive myself for allowing that behaviour. I was in a different state of mind. If only I had known then what I know now. I did the best I could and it’s ok…it’s enough. I forgive myself!
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” – Buddha
Please leave any comments, thoughts, or experiences you’d like to share…I’d love to read them!
Artwork Credit – “Comtesse d’Haussonville” Jean-Auguste Dominique Ingres and “Maternal Admiration” William-Adolphe Bouguereau